It's Friday night and I am chilling at home with my main man beside me. He is looking at me make a photo book of him for his uncle, in between his naps. I decided to make a funny picture book with all his funny faces and some words beneath them. I think his uncle will like it. I usually would have made some jewelry during this time, but I don't have enough hands.
My minutes, hours, days, weeks, months are all a blur. They all flow in to each other as one in the same. Just me, the man in my life, and my family. I don't even have to leave the house. I swear I don't feel like I'm missing anything and especially since it's so hot outside too, the air condition speaks the right language to me. I like hot, but not 90+ hot every day.
I question what it will be like to date after Ian and I get the hang of this thing called life. I haven't done a lot of things since I became pregnant with him and I'm not sure how much I will do now that he's here. He requires a lot, he takes a lot, and I am more than happy to do everything I can for him. I think he was yelling at me today though, . I let my grandmother feed him and I guess he thought I was going to do it but when I didn't he seemed to be complaining as he voiced his displeasure then turned away from me so he could get his milk. It was funny to see.
We are a package deal now, and though I am not even thinking about dating right now, when I do get ready to (maybe sometime next year), I need to have my priorities in order with no additional baggage or short comings. I don't plan on settling on just anyone so they can be a father figure for Ian, the father role is taken care of. It's just the husband role is lacking . Until that situation fills itself, Ian and I will be the best of friends and even after that too.
In the mean time, my Fridays will be spent making jewelry, watching t.v., pumping, and chilling with my baby. My joy. It may not sound like much, but to me it is more than enough.
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